Nicknames
by Scotty1609
Summary: 9-year-old Robin shares Batman's dark, dirty secrets with the Justice League... MWUAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA  sorry if Bats is a little OOC  Changed from YJ section to YJ/JL x-over. Y? I SAID SO THAT'S WHY!


**TOTAL CRACKfic!**

**okay, i wrote this like forever ago and just got around to posting it. :P people seemed to LOVE my 'Speedy-GreenArrow-Flash-and-KidFlash-are-overprotective-of-Robin' story, so now, here is my 'Batman's-dark-dirty-secrets-are-revealed-thanks-to-nine-year-old-Robin'**

**ENJOY!  
>BTW- I own NOTHING! (except MOST of the nick-names!) what does Scotty1609 mean? READ, MY LITTLE COMMUNISTS AND FIND OUT!<strong>

Batman had called for a meeting- "A short one," he had said. "Only a couple of moments of your time." But now, it was 3:32PM, and the Bat, Mr. Be-On-Time-Or-Suffer-The-Deadly-Consequences, was two minutes late to his own meeting. Wally was so bored that he resorted to asking Superman questions that made no sense and honestly, made him sound like a 9-year-old even more than usual. Green Lantern and Shayera had taken to flirting, while Diana had decided to refrain from any conversation. She was pondering why Batman had even called the meeting in the first place. If it would only take moments, why was he late?

The door swishing open announced J'onn's entrance. The Dark Knight, his cloak pulled together in the front so that only a pillar of black could be seen, followed.

Wally was a red blur, his fiery hair clashing with his costume (he had his hood down) as he ran up to Batman. He clapped his hands together eagerly. "So... Batsie! What's this all about?"

Batman glared out of the corner of his eyes at the younger hero, then, rather reluctantly, said, "He's been begging to meet you and, well..." He opened his cloak to reveal a tiny body- a boy, no more than nine. The boy walked out of the shadows warily, and everyone gazed at him curiously. The boy's suit made him look like a traffic light- red, green, and yellow- and it clashed with his deep black hair. He wore a little mask over his eyes, and a little red 'R' was on the right of his chest. He had his arms behind his back, and he blushed as he looked up at all of the heroes. Diana and Shayera eyed eachother- was this Bruce's son? Either way, he was adorible! He even had his own little utility belt.

Batman cleared his throat and smiled softly when the boy looked up at him. "I thought you wanted to meet my friends, Robin?"

"_Friends?" _Superman mouthed with a grin at the Bat, who looked as if he wanted to give the Big Blue Boyscout a good kick in the pants.

"So, you're called Robin?" Green Lantern said, smiling at the boy.

"Yeah..." he said softly. "And you're Green Lantern!" He blushed at how loud his voice had come out.

To everyone's surprise, Batman gave a large grin and picked the boy up in his arms, propping him on his hip. The Bat totally had the 'Daddy' move down. The boy smiled at everyone as he introduced them out loud. "Hawkgirl, Miss Shayera... Flash, Mr. Wally... Green Lantern, Mr. John... Martian Manhunter, Mr. J'onn... Superman, Mr. Clark... Wonder Woman, Miss Diana... and Batman, Bruce!"

"I see that you are quite the detective," J'onn said with a soft smile. Robin nodded.

"Everyone says that Bruce and I are a lot alike, but I don't think so. I'm not grumpy _all _the time, only when I have to take a bath."

The women and the speedster laughed openly while everyone else just chuckled (Except Bruce, who was scowling largely.)

Superman began to speak. "So, you and your dad-"

"Oh, Bruce isn't my dad."

Everyone stared. "You mean he puts someone else's kid in danger?" Shayera hissed to Green Lantern, who shrugged.

Bruce cleared his throat and shifted Robin on his hip. "I'm fostering him. He found out about my being the Batman, and he wanted in."

Diana frowned. "So you _let _him?"

Bruce shrugged. "Why not?"

"How old are you, Robin?" Flash asked, trying to relieve the minor tension.

"Nine."

The tension grew, and Batman put Robin on the floor. The boy ran over to Flash and grabbed his hand. "Will you play with me? Bruce always talks about how annoying you are, so you must be a lot of fun!"

Wally grinned ear-to-ear. "Sure, kid!"

Diana leaned forward. "Ooooh... So Bruce talks about us a lot?"

Batman blushed and opened his mouth to speak, but Shayera waved him away, and J'onn put a mental mute button on the man, so all he could do was mouth the curses he spoke at the alien.

"Oh, yeah!" Robin smiled. "He tells me about all of your adventures for bedtime stories. I really like the one where Mr. John-"

"Just John, please, kid."

"Okay. I really like the one where Just John makes a big net and catches Killer Moth before the Flash swoops in and drags him off."

Wally sat back, reminiscing, grinning.

"What _else _does he say about us?" Superman smiled. J'onn was now using a mental block to hold Batman's feet to the floor.

"Oh, he talks about Miss Diana a _loooooot_. I have to ask him to talk more about you guys, and then he calls you a Big Blue Blundering Boyscout. He has nicknames for all of you in his stories!"

Clark lifted an eyebrow. Batman reached for his utility belt, but J'onn just waved at him, and he froze, his eyes darting about the room viciously.

Robin grinned and answered questions. The conversation went much like this:

Shayera: "What does he call me in the stories?"

Robin: "Angel."

Shayera: "AW!"

Bruce: **blush**

Diana: "And me?"

Robin: "Princess."

Diana: **grin**

Bruce: **faint (if he wasn't the Batman)**

John: "Me?"

Robin: "Lamp-Man."

John: **frown**

Superman: "And _me_?"

Robin: "Boyscout."

J'onn: "I am curious to know my 'nick-name'."

Robin: "Martie."

J'onn: **frown**

Flash: **clears throat** "And me?"

Robin: **frown **"Alfred says I'm not supposed to say that word..."

Everyone: **HAHAHAHAHAHA!**

By now, J'onn had let go a rather disgrundled Batman. The man swooped up his ward, scowling at everyone. "Good. Bye."

Everyone was howling and cackling as the two left. Flash called after them, "Hey, Brucie! We were just having some _fun_!

**MEANWHILE:**

Bruce was scowling as he carried his 'son' down the hall. "Richard..."

"Yes?" the boy said innocently.

Batman smiled weakly, remembering Diana's smile at hearing the Dark Knight's nick-name for his lover. "Thanks, kid."

**OKAAAAAAAAAY... If u are a fan of my story, MEET THE FAMILY, with all of my OC's and stuffs, please answer my Q in this review u ARE going to post!**

**(I already have the next chapter for MTF planned out, but I want help for the CH after-)**

**1. A regular patrol night for BlackHawk, BatGirl, and Batman**

**2. Bruce has a 'chat' with Jason and Barbara (ABOUT WHAT I WILL NOT TELL! - no it's not romance- THEY'RE SIBLINGS, YOU PERVERTS!)**

**3. ? (Ideas?)**


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